mimi smartypants
Seriously, though: what's with the penguins?

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กาสะลองส่องจีน ตอน 14 : โหลดทิ้ง ...:จะเดินทางไปเที่ยวที่ไหนก็ตามแต่ในปักกิ่ง ท่าน ๆ จะต้องใช้รถไฟฟ้าใต้ดินกันนะครับ หากไม่ได้มากับทัวร์ การเคลื่อนตัวด้วยวิธีนี้ง่าย เหมาะสม ...

It’s fucking wild to watch social media try to deal with the protests and the not-very-shocking “news” that black lives are devalued by racist social structures, including but not limited to health care, the justice system, city planning, and education. Even me with my dumb diary-blog! I am not a “brand,” I have never had an ad or been paid to post anything, and I rarely comment on current events, but like everyone else I went back and forth with Do I Mention What Is On My Mind vs. Do I Shut Up And Let Other People Talk. 

Probably either way is okay. Here is what is not okay, social-media-wise:

A fake-eyelashes Mormon lady on Instagram with some “not all cops” and “violence is never okay” and “can’t we all get along” crap. Can we all get along? I don’t know. Maybe ask the captain of your local badge-wearing murderous thug squad? Or the elected officials who respond with various forms of “hmmm how unfortunate” every time a cop murders someone, even if it’s on video with numerous witnesses?

Then there’s the woke blogger who gives you a reading list, which is…okay? But not enough? You can read forever and reading is good but there is danger in academically knowing all about racism, feeling comfortable that YOU don’t do or say racist things, and still not having done any real work on yourself. (I do like donation roundups, though! So many small and new-to-me orgs that I’ve added to my Give Away Money list.)

IT IS OFFICIAL

I am not going back to the office for the summer and maybe not for the rest of the year. The work-from-home policy is for pandemic reasons, although I might be working from home a bit even if the world were virus-free, because my office building had a few issues with broken glass.* We have been told that returning to work there in person, in our bras and real-person pants, is “voluntary” for 2024. I think I will stay right here, thanks.

I need to make some tweaks to my schedule and also get my mind out of the “this is temporary” space, but I am realizing that the public transit commute sucked up quite a bit of time. A lot of it was enjoyable time—reading and podcasts and the beautiful view as the El trundled across the beautiful river. But a lot of it was stressful too—sitting on a train car thinking about starting dinner and putting in laundry while not being able to do it. Or rushing to leave at a certain time in order to have the type of evening I wanted to have, with the laptop in a backpack to resentfully haul out later and actually finish the work.

Now I start work extremely early, up with the birds at stupid o’clock, take a huge break in the middle of the day, and work a little more in the early evening. Biphasic sleep and biphasic work. I am like a farmer in preindustrial Europe. (In so many ways! Astrology, bloodletting, civil unrest, the noble class controlling the land, oh and of course living through the New Black Death.)

*The protests were very centered around my work neighborhood, especially on the first Saturday night, and it was surreal to see footage of my building, “my” Trader Joe’s with a burning SUV out front, “my” smashed-up 7-11, “my” looted Starbucks. I wonder if anyone broke into the Starbucks and calmly made their own latte, for protest refreshment. Or if any vegan protestors got away with some non-dairy milk. Just so the broken windows weren’t for naught. 

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—mimi smartypants has been enlarged to show detail.